Can Work-Life Balance As A Mother Exist?
Finding that all important work-life balance as a mother often feels impossible. It feels like we are damned if we do and damned if we don’t at times! The Stay At Home Mum feels guilty for not bringing in the money, but the Working Mum feels guilty for leaving the children and going out to work! Can we all just stop it!?
I have been on a bit of a mission to find if there is a better way, one where we can have our cake and eat it too. With the Capability of the Digital World literally at our fingertips, all barriers to us Mums are falling away. These are very exciting times to be living in!
The other day this quote hit me right in the heartstrings:
“The obligation for working mothers is a very precise one: the feeling that one ought to work as if one did not have children, while raising ones children as if one did not have a job” Annabel Crabb in The Wife Drought
I felt that this was a shockingly true statement. Is it right to be living our lives in such different compartments like this? What is worse, is that it seems to have been accepted as the norm! How is it possible to be truly at peace when we have torn ourselves into so many pieces? Can work-life balance as a mother truly exist? I think if we change the nature of the work to be more congruent with ourselves, it might be possible.
We have separate boxes for;
I can’t help but feel that a fully integrated life where all of these segments come together would be the path to living at peace as a mother. A life where your family, work and love all come together and flow as one. You are one person, you shouldn’t then be split into boxes, it can only lead to internal conflict. Can we create a life where we love what we do, but this doesn’t take over all other parts of our lives? I believe it can be done!
I often feel that once we have children, we become a square peg in a round hole. We no longer fit the working paradigm and have to contort ourselves to still try to fit into this pigeon hole. It is impossible to do this successfully in all areas without compromising something, usually ourselves.
My husband lost his job a few months back and we have been surviving on savings, sold cars and a very timely tax rebate so far. As we get towards the end of our money though, the pressure is mounting for me to get out there and earn too, but with little 2-year-old Grace here at home and Archie at school, I just don’t feel it is possible.
I felt utterly stuck. To go out to work needs child care, which costs a packet, and would use up the wages I would have gone out to earn anyway. I haven’t been self-employed for years now, who would have me out in the working world? The job would need to be so specific to have to work around school times as well. I just felt paralyzed, utterly stuck, useless and distraught.
However, I have found it is possible to do what I love and monetise it by leveraging the internet properly and standing on the shoulders of giants. By giants here I mean the massive corporations like Amazon or large companies who already have products and infrastructure which you can earn commissions on by referring their products to others (affiliate Marketing). This enables you to earn your own income, on your terms and allows you to bring all your values together too. No more splitting yourself apart!
What Could Life Look like?
A new income stream gets me wondering; What if I had built up my side income to be able to take over the living expenses plus a bit one day? Start an internet business which shoulders the costs of the everyday expenses, and frees me up to live the life I am meant to live instead of the one I have to live.
My dream would be to send the kids to a fantastic school where they are taught in a way I love and in an inspiring environment. I want to be able to spend the whole summer holiday away with the kids when they break up from school! Take some time for myself for a change, and not feel guilty for it because I will be providing for my family in every way.
I am trying to set an example now for my kids by living the best life I can. I want to set this example for them in front of their eyes, showing them that they can follow and live their dreams too! Proving it by living it myself!
Becoming A Digital Mumpreneur
After looking into many avenues and talking to a lot of people, I have found that building an online business seems to be the answer. It means I can build my business from home and do it when my children are asleep or at school, yet still be here when they need me. There is a vast range of online businesses now, actually, 70% of people now have some sort of income from the internet!
We can learn to sell safely online, importing through china, become social media experts, affiliate marketers, consultants, paid bloggers and all sorts… all with a global reach. It’s actually really exciting! We can kick the whole concept of the 9 to 5 rat race into the nappy bin!
It sounds too good to be true, but I personally know people who are doing exactly this! They have fantastic work-life balance as mothers. They are just everyday people who have learned a system and applied the steps. There is a fellow Mum in our community who has built a 6 figure income doing just this, and retired her husband from a job that he hates, how cool is that?
I am learning this system now too, there is nothing to stop me achieving results because I have seen others do it! It is not easy by any stretch, it is pushing me out of my comfort zone in many ways, is hard work and is a very steep learning curve. I know it won’t happen overnight, I would be very dubious and skeptical if it did to be honest!… But the end result will be so worth it!
Being The Middle-Mum
I can see others making an honest living doing it, and it’s nothing new, I am just cross I have only recently found out about it! I don’t need my own products or to create my own courses, I just needed some great products of other peoples which they pay me commissions on to promote. In essence, all I am is the middle-mum! Sharing something I am passionate about, that aligns with my values, allowing me to love what I do! It then opens up that integrated life and I no longer feel torn and split apart anymore!
So can work-life balance as a mother exist? I honestly think it can if we shift our focus, change the work dynamics and keep an open mind to new possibilities! We just need to learn the necessary skills to be able to leverage the internet and we can make it work from all angles.
The journey to this integrated life started when I was introduced to my coach in this same Video Series. After watching it, I enrolled on the course and am now learning the skills and building my own business online. This is bringing me that balance I really needed as a Mother. It is a broad digital skills course where you can find your own strengths and then focus on what you want to do, rather than only learning social media for example. The free 7 Part Video Series introduces my trainers and teaches you how to start a simple and profitable online business starting from scratch. See what you think!
My Mission is to help Mums create a more deliberate lifestyle and make their own living online around their passion. I empower and help them become strong, independent and financially secure women.
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